GILES HARDIE

If you want to know how tall your favourite Hollywood action star is, Google him (or her). Don’t like the answer? Google again.

it seems that for every big name actor there are a number of numbers floating around to indicate just how big they are.

Sylvester Stallone is 5′ 10″ (178 centimetres), or is it 5′ 9″? (Or, whisper it, 5′ 7″?) Arnold Schwarzenegger is 6′ 2″, according to Arnold Schwarzenegger, but 6′ 1″ or 6′ 0″ on various websites and US Weekly tried to claim he was actually 5′ 10″ in 2002.

Brad Pitt has ranged from 5′ 10″ to 6′ 1″, Zac Efron is 5′ 7″ plus or minus an inch, Leonardo DiCaprio is 6′ 1″ … or possibly not.

for an industry near-obsessed with image, one of the basic, legitimate measures of it is more obscured than ever before. why? because on set, it doesn’t matter. off set, it makes all the difference.

In fact, on set a diminutive lead actor can be a blessing, as lead actresses are prone to be truly tiny. In real life though, “petite” is fine as an adjective for women only.

As far as the end product is concerned, in the modern cinema landscape, height just doesn’t factor in. Chris Evans is neither a 5′ 0″ weakling nor a 6′ 6″ adonis prone to leaping off six-story tanks. He’s 6′ 0″ (or 5′ 11″), yet he was convincing as both in Captain America.

Aussie Chris Hemsworth is genuinely big, 6′ 3″ to 4″, yet in Thor he loomed at least a foot or more above the other mere mortals of Earth.

Height doesn’t matter in the digital age. Suspension of disbelief does. It’s all fine as long as the audience will believe the actor is as tall as the character is meant to be.

the online backlash to the announcement of Tom Crusie as Jack Reacher in one Shot, the first adaptation of Lee Child’s blockbuster novel series, has been overwhelmingly dedicated to the fact that Reacher – who is fictional and thus of specific height – is 6′ 5″ and Tom Cruise is decidedly … not.

clearly the filmmakers are confident that somewhere between a cheap wooden soap box and a multi-million-dollar digital effects budget they can overcome any practical difficulties brought about by Cruise’s stature. But can the publicists? the fans are frothing with short-man syndrome.

the obsession with height is relatively new. Alan Ladd, who played Shane in the movie of the same name, was a mere 5′ 5″ but you wouldn’t know it from watching his films. Even when Cruise shot to fame in films such as Risky Business and Top Gun, the camera was careful placed to make sure neither Rebecca De Mornay nor Kelly McGillis loomed over him, even if Val Kilmer and Anthony Edwards occasionally did.

With the advent of the internet though, basic forms in which actors filled in their basic details years ago are becoming as shameful as the nude photo shoots starlets seem to be eerily attracted to before they make it.

one website, www.celebheights.com – with the mantra “In the land of Hollywood Pygmies, the elevator-shoed Dwarf is King” and run by a Glaswegian with his tongue firmly wedged in his cheek – is devoted to finding, comparing and then hopefully user-checking the various heights of the rich and famous.

the site has no final answer on how tall Tom Cruise is, citing various 5′ 7″ and 5′ 9″ answers, though it does have one quote from Billy Connolly stating Cruise is at least 5′ 10″ and that he’s a “Smashing guy. Everybody thinks he’s a small guy. He’s not. I think they would like him to be wee. I think they’re jealous b…ards.”

Cruise is not the first action star to come under height scrutiny. Sylvester Stallone was long suspected to be shorter than his official height by many, including Oscar-winning screenwriter William Goldman.

In his 2000 book, which Lie did I Tell? More Adventures in the Screen Trade, the writer of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and the Princess Bride admits, “I am hopelessly smitten with finding out the truth about how tall performers are”.

“Most movie stars are short. (I’m six-one, and the only major stars who are taller that I have met are [Clint] Eastwood and [Sean] Connery)” he reveals. “Stars’ stumpiness is the beginning of my obsession. But when you throw action stars into the blend, guys who slay legions, well, it’s just too yummy for me to resist.”

Goldman enjoys debunking star’s height myths because “stars have lifts in their boots – why else, pray tell, do you think they wear them all the time? They have lifts in their shoes, their loafers, their slippers. I know one who has lifts in his socks.”

so when he heard that Stallone was in the pool at a hotel Goldman was staying in, the temptation to find the truth was overwhelming. Based on a scientific test involving simultaneous towelling, Goldman states unequivocally that Stallone is “sixty-seven inches [5' 7"], dripping wet”.

which proves either actors shrink in the water, or a 5′ 7″ Tom Cruise may just be able to stretch to Jack Reacher.

– Sydney Morning Herald

Cruise raises Hollywood height issues