IT'S that time of year again when many of us are returning home and/or to work after holidays.

Some of us will be rested, while others will feel as if they need to take another vacation to recover from the one they supposedly just enjoyed.

It doesn’t seem to matter whether the holiday was long or short, taken at home or away, there’s a tendency to set high expectations – expectations that, during and on returning and reflecting, are rarely met, leading to anger, disappointment and the opinion that time, energy and money were wasted.

This can occur for a range of reasons, varying from imagining scenarios that owe more to Disney and the pristine world of commercials than reality; to overspending, over-eating, over-drinking and experiencing the cumulative effects.

Then there are those lucky ones who have such a great time removed from the mundaneness of everyday life that returning creates a massive downer, which is emotionally and psychologically hard to overcome.

While the latter does happen, it’s the former that experts warn is more likely to occur.

Trapped on a holiday that’s nothing like the daydreams of anticipation, it’s easy to begin to regret the dollars spent, wishing the people you’re with would vanish or that you’d sold your children to science before you left.

Depression and resentment set in, turning the dream holiday into a nightmare.

Florida psychologist Dr Janet Frank writes: "many of us experience ‘holiday blues’, ranging from a sense of increased stress to major depression. These feelings can be brought about by many factors, including increased stress and fatigue, unrealistic expectations, too much commercialisation, or inability to be with family (or too much family). Increased demands of shopping, parties, and house guests can also contribute."

Just before you begin to summon the demons of your worst holiday, imagine what it must be like for the surviving passengers of the Costa Concordia, the luxury cruise liner which sank after striking rocks near Isola di Giglio, off the Tuscan coast in Italy, on, of all days, Friday the 13th.

While most of the 4200 passengers and crew have been rescued, lives have been lost and, in a day and age when technology, navigational systems and obsessions around health and safety abound, it’s tragic that something that recalls the sinking of the Titanic could happen.

It’s the worst-case holiday scenario made manifest.

Having just returned from a cruise myself, there was a particular frisson reading about the tragedy of the Costa.

It also made my worst holiday, when back in the early-1990s we drove from Bendigo to Sydney to meet the family, then on to Port Douglas in a convoy, seem like Monty Pythonesque luxury.

We were in an old Holden station wagon with two small children, a carload of Christmas and birthday presents and no airconditioning.

The car struggled and broke down, the family fought, we became lost, hot and flustered and ran out of money.

Ready to strangle one another, we were on our way home when a cyclone trapped us in Townsville.

After driving inland almost to Mount Isa to circumvent the worst effects of the cyclone and find an open road that led south, we drove via Cloncurry and a range of towns I’ve never seen before or since, ending up at my parents’ house in Sydney, only to have the unpacked car stolen that night.

We caught a bus back to Bendigo without presents, with only the clothes on our backs and some borrowed money, memories of scorching heat, relentless dust, lashing rain, arguments and stress our only souvenirs.

But this is nothing to what others have endured and if it’s the worst holiday ever (as my kids refer to it), then we’re doing all right.

Regardless of how we spend them, holidays are precious, especially in this workaholic world where the demands are high and the rewards and family time few.

Instead of spending vast sums on holidays away, I don’t know why more of us don’t simply holiday at home; unwind in our backyards, literally and metaphorically, by exploring more of our beautiful state.

If we did, we would probably feel more relaxed, save money, have fewer fights, lower expectations (which may be exceeded), and we might even feel as if we’ve had the break we deserved.

And, let’s face it, struggling Queensland tourism and local businesses would certainly thank us.

Dr Karen Brooks is an associate professor of media studies at Southern Cross University.

Holiday blues are made of dreams